Being at home, and enjoying it?

I think I love my life.

"You think?" you ask. "Don't you know? Didn't you choose this?"

Well, technically, yes, I did. And in some ways, I do love it. But there are days, you know those days. Days when I ask myself, "What are you doing?" Doesn't everyone?

I chose to homeschool my kids. Before you go correcting me, I have made that one word. I like it that way. In my world 'homeschool' is one word. Anyway, the reasons are several. They include:

• moving a lot around the kids' school year and not really knowing when and where we will end up
• my kids not really learning great in a typical school environment and wanting better for them
• having lots of homeschooling resources at hand
• I am not a morning person...so I don't want to have to follow someone else's schedule that forces me to get up and get them on the bus by a certain time...
• I was homeschooled for a lot of my school-life and I really liked it for the most part, and have some really good memories from it
• etc...

But the main reason is simple: I've wanted to be a teacher since I was in Kindergarten. And I could go be a Kindergarten teacher and get paid (very little, IMO*) and enroll my kids in school. OR I could be with them, and teach them, and share my love of teaching and learning and fun ideas with the very people I chose to produce. Why spend my days with other kids missing my own every other moment, when I could still do what I love and watch my own kids grow at the very same time!


Sounds like a perfect solution, right? Having the skills to be a classroom teacher and the passion for it should make me perfect, right?


Um, there's this other detail... being a mom and being a teacher aren't exactly the same. You don't necessarily parent the same way you teach, and vice-versa. There's a certain skill you need to separate the daily parenting from the classroom set-up, so you don't end up getting frustrated with the kids being at all different ages, stages, grades and ability levels. And you can't expect your kids to have the same kind of view of you as other students. They won't. You're their mom. All kids treat their teachers differently than their moms. You did when you were in school. 
But I went into it with a lot of high expectations for my kids and their behavior. Let me just say this, even though it should be obvious: There are no perfect people. Not perfect parents, not perfect teachers, not perfect kids. 


"Yeah, duh, we know."


But If you go into anything with an ideal and a pre-conceived notion of how it should turn out, sometimes you forget that and you don't even realize that that's a type of perfection in your unspoken expectation. You don't even realize that you are setting yourself up for disappointment. 

I am not really disappointed at myself or homeschooling, or my kids. I just think that I can sometimes be a better teacher, and have much more patience at times. Poor kids.

When I started out, it was great. My kids were close together, so I could feasibly do the same curriculum with both. My oldest was 6, going into Kindergarten, and the next one was less than 2 years behind and very clever, so she could keep up with the program. Easy peasy.  But I was also pregnant. This meant that the baby was nicely contained in my belly and I didn't have to interrupt the lessons to care for him or have him be a total distraction to my kids as I held him while trying to teach them anything. So for the first part of my homeschool life, it went so well, I had my expectations high. And met, for the most part.

But then, along came my baby. I had to go to work to pay the bills in the afternoon, so I did homeschooling in the morning, then Grandma watched them while I spent the rest of the day in a Learning Center, teaching others. But not being with my baby tore me up. So when the opportunity to watch other kids in my home full time arose, it was a real solution. I could be with all my kids all day, teach them, and still teach others and get paid for it. In my home. No problem. I already watch at least 4-10 kids by myself. 

Only problem was, I didn't have both babies and older kids in the same class. All the kids were divided into classrooms by age and development, and I had taught in all the classes. But never all together. This is my biggest challenge. Well, that and my kids' attitudes. So, it is really a learning process.

It is a bit stressful to be stuck at home with no bus to take all my kids in to go anywhere during the day. All the Homeschooling families in the area can take advantage of outings and deals for things I can't really do because I am stuck at home. And it is hard. Anyone who's had lots of kids in their care knows this. Kids are so unpredictable you can't ever really plan for everything. There are things about this job that I just don't really like that much. So, some days I think to myself "why?" "Why did I choose this? What was I really expecting? What am I going to do?"


I'm no quitter. Well, OK, there are things I've quit. But this is not going to be one of them, in terms of just giving up. I mean, I may decide with my husband at some point that the best thing is to enroll my kids into a school. I may go all out with my at-home daycare and then my kids will go to another school. Who knows right now what the future will hold, other than God, of course.  But I'm not just going to give up because it's harder that I thought it would be, or because my expectations aren't being met. And I love my kids. I love them so much! They deserve the best I can give them. 


If you've ever wondered to yourself "Should I homeschool my kids?" (Now that the school year is over and it's summer)
I can share a few tips with you and give you some pre-decision questions to think about and ask yourself.

1. Do I love to teach?
2. If not love, but I could still do it, do I have a lot of patience with my kids?
3. Why do I think homeschooling would be better than sending them to elementary school?
4. What would I do? (How would I plan the days, what would my schedule and routine and curriculum look like?)
5. Where would the 'classroom' be?
6. Do you have a homeschooling group or online forum for connecting with other homeschooling parents and families?
7. Do I know the rules of homeschooling and the laws for my area/state?

If you have answers for some of these, and it looks good for homeschool, but you want more info, God bless you. A lot of families simply can't do it because of their work schedules and financial responsibilities, while others just don't have the patience. There are a lot of good teachers and some really good schools out there. Homeschooling isn't for the lazy or faint of heart. But if you (and your spouse) are committed to doing school this way and doing it right, you can succeed. But you really need to do your homework, research, and get connected with others who are like-minded. Sometimes doing a co-op is perfect for once a week or month, to have other classes you just don't have the skills to teach, or for breaking up the monotony and just getting out of the house.  
I joined a homeschool co-op and I love it, and we are still getting together for outings during the summer.  


I have a lot of fun sitting in the evenings after the kids go to bed and planning and coming up with new lessons and projects. I like the challenge of fitting the babies, and toddlers into our routines. I enjoy engaging the kids in discussions about what they really want to learn, and how we can incorporate their ideas into our curriculum. This is what teaching is all about to me.
If you have never taught before, that doesn't mean you can't do it. You can get some education on how to home school. It helps to have training and even a degree, but being your child's parent is a good qualifier. You know all about your child; what their learning styles are (look up the different styles and discover it if you're not sure) and their tendencies. You know what their excited about and what they struggle with. 

Homeschooling can be great. I love it, and when my kids are asked, they love it, too. And it is Worth It. It really is.


So, yes, I love my life. Sometimes.